Moving along

After three days of goodbyes, tears, airport hugs, last pictures, last Chinese suppers, thank you cards, and reunions plans for the future, I sat down on the carpet of my room and looked around. Dirty and clean laundries on the floor, scattered, unsure of where it's suppose to sit. On my bed, notebooks and papers from school, folders and books from the pre-orientation, also lost. Who would've thought that these petty things, have meanings and memories and indescribable adventures. I've realized that it is not about leaving these things here, it's about leaving. Period. The closer it is to the day of where things will end (hopefully, only temporary), the more I procrastinate and cry and just sit there in my room, on the carpet floor, looking around at these things. Attachments are never easy. It's not like purposely super gluing your fingers together like how it used to be in primary school. Sometimes you wish it is but the connection between you and people and things, in most cases happens when you least expect it, and man, that is one super glue.

So I freaked out, got really scared and I felt lonely. Left a message of myself breaking down emotionally on Eve's cell, because I had no one else to talk to. 20 minutes later, she called, and after a while and a really long three days of all that shit, I feel like it's going to be okay now.

Watched a movie about pies, marriage affairs, pregnancy, serving food, domestic violence, and life. Felt a little better, took a cold shower, made some plans for the day, and letting it all go right here. 

And so it will end eventually, and I will never have all these things figured out if it wasn't for the 9 hours worth of sleep. Thank you God, for I have a bed to sleep in.

Hope everybody else is doing better.